Really Deep Thoughts

How do you stand up for a friend...
...When you can't tell if the battle is theirs or yours?
...When you don't even know where to begin?
...When you don't even stand up for yourself?
...When doing so would cause a lot of drama/ruffled feathers/effort?
...When you don't even know that it will be good for your friend?
...When it's all in the past?