Let Them Eat Bugs

Insulting. That's the word I will use to sum up this season of the Celebrity Apprentice. And it's a damn shame, because there are literally no other shows that I demand to watch live, every week, every episode, every second.

I don't love the celebrity format. I much prefer the old school way, with fourteen nobodies cutting each other's throats to win a spot in Donald Trump's business. No celebrities milking their fame, making appearances to sell cupcakes, calling their Hollywood hookups--I like the old format which required actual hard work and ingenuity. Celebrity Apprentice is about who the celebrities know with deep pockets--no work required.

To have the final faceoff be between the two celebrities who had riled up the most controversy on the show was a slap in the face. Does NBC not think I can watch the Apprentice without a cat fight? Without slackers? Without yelling?

And to find out afterwords that Blaine Trump operates the charity Joan Rivers was representing--embarrassing.

For the sake of other Americans who share my IQ and love for a good, honest fight--bring back the old format. Use young entrepeneurs with business smarts--let them fight for a spot in the Trump organization. No more half-assed, C-list celebrities trying to muster enthusiasm for random charity fund-raising. If you're going to continue this, they should be wearing loin clothes, Janice Dickinson and Tyra Banks should take Ivanka's spot, and they should have to eat bugs. And sing for their survival.

Oh, and Jesse should have won, with Annie and Herschel rounding out the top three. Jesse was fired because he was the exact opposite of Trump: no schmoozing, no getting ahead by who he knows, no sitting in an air-conditioned office making phone calls in a suit. Jesse represented hard work, true fund-raising, and brutal honesty. Trump couldn't handle it.