Valentine's Day (With a Side of Bitter)

Valentine's Day 2009:

Instead of roses,

I have antidepressant detox

Instead of a night on the town,

I have a night on the couch

Instead of sushi,
I have reheated pizza

Instead of jewelry,

I have knockoff Uggs and sweats

Instead of strawberries,

I have new zits

Instead of the light of candles,

I have the darkness of writer's block

Instead of a romantic bath,

I have itchy contacts

Instead of brownies,

I have cheap chocolate cake batter

Instead of poetry read to me at bedtime,

I have a watersoaked copy of Calvin and Hobbes

Instead of the ideal Valentine's Day I've never had,

I have another night alone

And instead of an apologetic phone call acknowledging the holiday that millions of other couples celebrate annually...

I'll be lucky to get a phone call.