Thoughts on A Day Without Gays

...Really wishing I had an employer to call today, just to exploit this (I'm not gay, but I am a taker)
...Thinking maybe next week should be a Day Without Chubbies, just to show everyone that we'd be missed (someone's gotta be concerned about when we eat next)
...There's some people who I know are participating in this whole-heartedly, and I hope they get fired (Gay, straight, Jewish, ugly--some people are just jerks)
...If they really want to prove they'd be missed (which no one contested in the first place, as far as I know), they ought to go to Canada for a year...Gateway Mall's probably crowded
...Okay, so when Mexican immigrants did this last year, people got mad at Cafe Rio, so should I get mad at all shampoo boys and the entire staff of Banana Republic?
...I wish I could see the looks on boss' faces all over America ("Oh, uh, Johnson, what are you doing here today?" "What do you mean, sir?" "Uh, nothing...")...I'm thinking this whole connection between the words "gay" and "sick" (i.e., sick day) is something the GLBT community has been trying to avoid/undo for years
...The insanity on Broadway tonight! The insanity!...If you're bisexual, do you just leave after lunch?
...I guess if you are at work, you can drop your pencil and feel confident bending over to pick it up today